(Photo by Tang Zou Cie)
"I'm sorry" is her favourite mantra and a 90-degree bow is usual her habit. Ngai Sin Kam, a Tzu Chi volunteer, is a simple and kind person, often described by others as "the Bodhisattva who never despises others". When faced with humiliation or misunderstanding, she always responds with a gentle smile, just as the Sutra of Infinite Meanings teaches: “If someone humiliates or insults you, you should never feel resentment.”
The transformation from "Silly Kam" to a diligent and inquisitive learner
Ngai Sin Kam was born in Hong Kong in 1955. Her family was poor, and their situation worsened when her father suffered a stroke and became bedridden. The whole family was in financial difficulty and often had to borrow money from relatives and friends to get by. As there were a total of ten siblings in the family, the elders would sometimes take her to shops or restaurants to collect leftover food so they could fill their stomachs.
As a child, Ngai Sin Kam was innocent and hardworking by nature. She enjoyed doing housework and never made a fuss with her siblings over it. However, the only challenge she faced at that time was her school performance, which was less than ideal. She even described herself as “muddleheaded,” earning her the nickname “Silly Kam” from her family, though she never took offense.
When she was in the third grade of primary school, she ranked last in the class. The teacher even said to her mother, "Your child’s grades are so poor that I'm afraid she won't be able to proceed to the fourth grade." After hearing this, her mother warned her sternly that if she didn't make any progress with her grades, she would not let her attend school anymore. That remark affected her deeply and since then she was determined to put in more effort in her studies. After school every day, once she finished with her house chores, she would start reading books at the staircase. Whenever she encountered words that she didn't know or content that she didn't understand, whoever passed by her, whether it was someone she knew or even a stranger, she would muster up her courage to ask for help. With this perseverance, she successfully moved on to the fourth grade and eventually completed her primary school studies.
Recalling these past experiences, Ngai Sin Kam smiled and said, “I grew up asking questions.” These childhood memories taught her to remain calm and composed when interacting with strangers, laying a solid foundation for her future work in Tzu Chi’s fundraising efforts.
Living a diligent and frugal life after settling in Singapore through marriage
Ngai Sin Kam started working at the age of 14, while at the same time taking English lessons. In 1982, at the age of 27, she migrated from Hong Kong to Singapore and married a fellow Hong Konger and had two sons. After marriage, her husband worked hard to build his career, while she was a homemaker taking good care of the family. Later in life, she and her husband started a business together, hence, the family's financial situation gradually improved.
In 1984, Singapore's economy was in recession and many shops and companies closed down. That was when her husband started his own business and naturally she became his right-hand woman. As a considerate and attentive person, Ngai Sin Kam was able to grasp customers’ preferences and very quickly she was trusted by many customers and her business grew better and better. Their business did not need advertising but solely relied on words of mouth. She also rebuilt her self-confidence in the process.
A single thought spurred her into action and her kind vow came true
When Ngai Sin Kam was 41 years old, she made a vow in a temple to do one good deed every day.
Not long after, Ngai Sin Kam received an invitation from the wife of the secretary of the nursing home, asking her to participate in the Mid-Autumn Festival Gala. It was this event that brought her into contact with Tzu Chi. From then on, her wish came true and since then, she had endless charitable deeds to do in her life.
In 1996, during a sign language group activity event at the Geylang East Home for the Aged, when Tzu Chi volunteers performed the song “Bringing Enlightenment to the World”, Ngai Sin Kam was deeply moved by the humanistic and beautiful performance and moving lyrics. Ngai Sin Kam, who already loved singing to begin with, happily joined the Tzu Chi sign language team after getting her husband’s approval. Afterwards, Tzu Chi volunteer Lye Geok Choo and her husband invited her to participate in various Tzu Chi activities such as sharing Tzu Chi with her friends and relatives, and charity fundraising.
Ngai Sin Kam was moved by the beautiful Tzu Chi sign language and decided to join Tzu Chi's sign language team. Pictured is Ngai Sin Kam interacting with people on and off the stage using sign language at a community networking event. (Photo by Low Hai Loon)
However, when Ngai Sin Kam first started volunteering with Tzu Chi, her husband did not agree with her devoting most of her time with Tzu Chi as during that time, she was the sole employee in his business, hence he did not want her to be distracted. Although she wished to participate more in Tzu Chi, she could only silently pray in her heart that one day she would have more opportunities to get involved.
Even though during the business start-up phase, Ngai Sin Kam chose to prioritise business development and her family needs, she never gave up sharing Tzu Chi’s philosophy and inspiration with her husband. Gradually, as their business went on track, her husband then put aside his concerns and started giving her more support to participate in Tzu Chi activities.
(Photo by Law Sook Fong)
Making a vow and setting the heart on the Bodhisattva Path
What impressed Ngai Sin Kam the most was her first participation in a fundraising campaign for the India earthquake. Growing up in a poor family and working far away from home, she could deeply understand the pain of the victims who lost their homes. Because of this, although she described herself as a "small screw" in Tzu Chi, she knew her value and significance, and found her direction and belonging in life here. Whether it was charity home visits, street fundraising, event reception, environmental protection advocacy or the Great Love Mothers programme in school campuses, she could be seen contributing.
Ngai Sin Kam likes to share about Tzu Chi with others and spread Jing Si Aphorisms. She recalled that when she was young, she often went to temples for worshipping in Hong Kong, but she always felt that she lacked guidance and did not know how to be a truly good person. It was not until she came into contact with Tzu Chi and heard Master Cheng Yen say, “Help to carry the food basket for people who are suffering in this world,” that she was deeply moved by the Master's spirit of leading by example. She said, "We not only witness the Master's actions, but more importantly, we are now following and walking on the Bodhisattva Path."
In 2004, Ngai Sin Kam was happy to return to Tzu Chi Taiwan and become certified as a Tzu Chi Commissioner with the Dharma name Tzu Qin. The self-admit “muddleheaded” Ngai Sin Kam was really glad that she was finally certified. At that very moment, she even silently made her first vow, "I want to be a Dharma protector of Tzu Chi!"
Ngai Sin Kam was deeply moved when she first came into contact with Tzu Chi's sign language and songs. Behind every song and every movement is the teachings of Master Cheng Yen, who guided her step by step into the world of Buddhism. She firmly believes in reincarnation, so she cherishes the karmic affinity of this life even more, "I must seize this lifetime and cherish the karmic affinity of Buddhism, because it is the most authentic Dharma."
She also acquired a lot of wisdom from Jing Si Aphorisms and the quote that impressed her the most was: "Idle people have no fun and busy people have no rumours." This aphorism was shared with her by Taiwanese Dharma sister Zheng Xiu Xiang when Ngai Sin Kam first became a Tzu Chi volunteer, and that deeply inspired her.
Someone once asked Ngai Sin Kam, “Why are you always so happy? Smiling all day long?” She smiled and replied, “I have entered the great door of Bodhisattva Path — Tzu Chi, and all I see are Bodhisattvas—volunteers.” She said, “As soon as I walked into Tzu Chi, I felt so happy because everyone loved me so much!” More importantly, “Being involved in Tzu Chi makes me feel very useful. Just like the Master said, I can be a very ‘small screw’ but I can also play an indispensable role.”
Ngai Sin Kam has been a member of the Great Love Mothers team since it was established in 2007. They regularly visit schools and share Jing Si Aphorisms and positive values with primary school students in a lively and interesting way. (Photo by Law Sook Fong)
Humbling oneself to overcome anger and rigidity with gentleness and compassion
When faced with the anger of others, Ngai Sin Kam always chose to give in, not argue or make a scene, and "I'm sorry" became her mantra since young. After joining Tzu Chi as a volunteer, she still responds to unpleasant people and situations with a gentle and tolerant attitude. "Today, if I did not do well, and when others point out my mistakes, I listen humbly. If the other party misunderstood me, I would not resent. When I see him again the next day, I will still greet him with a smile and bow to him." She said with a smile, "I have been in Tzu Chi for so many years and I have always been like this."
Once, a senior volunteer reprimanded her loudly in public, but she didn't take it to heart and remained respectful and polite to him. More than ten years later, she finally won his recognition, and the volunteer praised her for her patience. "I am waiting for a change of heart. I am a very patient person. I always hope that one day he or she will understand and love me because I love them sincerely and hope for their wellbeing."
Ngai Sin Kam calls herself a representative of the Ah Q spirit because she knows that quarreling with others will only make her feel worse. "If it will make things worse, why bother to argue?"
She is considerate and sympathetic to those with bad tempers. "If a person loses his temper, there must be something bothering the person. Otherwise, normal people would not go crazy for no reason." She can put herself in other people's shoes to understand their suffering "because they are suffering in their hearts, at least in their world."
Ngai Sin Kam, who is nearly 70-year-old, described her life humorously, "I am what the Cantonese called 'Mong Cha Cha' (silly and confused) and I feel that life is easier this way." She also observed that although some people are smart and capable, they still have a hard time and suffer because of their obsession.
Ngai Sin Kam setting up a booth with her team during community events to recruit kind-hearted members of the public to join the volunteer team. (Photo by Fong Kwai Kin)
Raise funds and inspire kindness to forge meaningful connections far and wide
Ngai Sin Kam especially enjoys recruiting volunteers, raising funds, and inviting the public to join the ranks of “good people”. She firmly believes in Master Cheng Yen’s words: “Only when there are many Bodhisattvas can the causes and conditions be fulfilled.” Each time she recruits a new member for the donation team, she feels a deep sense of joy, seeing it as a precious karmic affinity. She constantly reflects on the Master’s teaching: “Gather love and forge kind affinities.”
As her belief in the law of cause and effect continues to deepen, she encourages everyone to make vows with courage. Once, at a book fair, she successfully recruited 23 new members. Whether it is a large-scale Tzu Chi event, a charity fair, or even a visit to the local market, she remains passionate about fundraising and forming kind affinities. In fact, during her most active period, she managed to recruit nearly 500 donating members.
(Photo by Yong Keah Pei)
Ngai Sin Kam believes that the most fulfilling part of her life has been becoming a Tzu Chi volunteer. Practising Buddhist wisdom in daily life and benefiting others has enriched her life journey, allowing her wisdom to grow through enlightenment. As a result, she now feels like the happiest, most relaxed, free, and fulfilled person in life.
Having been a Tzu Chi volunteer for nearly 30 years, Ngai Sin Kam has made a great vow, which is to become a Dharma protector of Tzu Chi, to guard this compassionate path of altruism and help others to continue this path forward firmly, gently, and humbly.
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